


I will die on my feet

by CandleInTheDark



Category: Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Gen, Ultimate Sacrifice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-12 20:33:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16878708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CandleInTheDark/pseuds/CandleInTheDark
Summary: Tatria knew that elves don't get fairytale endings when she signed up for this shit, sooner or later the Piper comes calling.





	1. Chapter 1

Riordan's body hit the ground with a wet and final thud, there was no need to check on the Warden for life, from that height he was dead. Leliana, from her vantage point, could see Tatria's and Alistair's faces, Alistair deflated, almost gave up, resolved himself, Tatria, on the other hand, looked very fae, to Leliana's eye she had accepted that this was more than a possibility a long time ago, accepted and come to peace with it.

“So...” Alistair's voice was very flat, “One of us dies.”

“Seems that way.”

“After all this...it isn't fair.”

Tatria sighed then pulled her love to her, kissing him fiercely, longingly, lingeringly until there was no more breath to do so. She rested her head on his chest and took a breath, “Life isn't fair, Alistair, there is no fair about a blight. Happy ever after is a thing for fairy tales and we are fresh out of pumpkins and wands.”

“Tatria, you need to...”

“No.” The elf's voice was quiet but firm and held every bit of command she had learned in and since the alieneage, “If you love me do not ask me what you were about to. We are not parting on those terms.” She backed away to look him fully in the eye, “We are Grey Wardens, Alistair, we knew that the Blight might kill us even when we didn't know it would kill one of us if we beat the archdemon. At no point have we turned away, so I say this to you, my love, I will not cower from death, it will not catch my back in running, I will not meet it on my knees, if I die I will face it standing and snarling defiance and I do that with your blessing or without.”

“I love you, I should be the one...but no, you're right, we are in this together.”

Tatria smiled, “We don't run away from the fire, we run through it. One more time love, for the Wardens! For Ferelden!” Alistair ran and Tatria took a breath as she gathered her own daggers in hand, call her a hypocrite but she was not going to let Alistair die, Ferelden needed its king more than it needed one more elf survivor, and he could do far more for her people than she ever could.

The last blow would be hers, but she had been living on borrowed time since her conscription in any case, sooner or later the wheel turned and the piper came calling.


	2. Chapter 2

The claw of the archdemon sent Tatria flying ten feet through the air, she rolled, came quickly to a knee then pounced, daggers flashing as she went after the dragon yet again. She had put everything from her mind in the last hour, Morrigan's offer, the witch's scorn as Tatria refused. She had liked Morrigan well enough but she had already manoeuvred her love into a loveless match because it was what Ferelden needed, she would not pressure him to be in the bed of another to save her own hide.

She had told Alistair she would be his mistress, when they had thought they might both survive. This was her one regret, but still she had needed to send him, send them both, to the field with hope in their hearts. Her daggers scored a hit and another, the dragon's legs buckled. It roared and lashed out with its head, Tatria dodged, ducked, scored a hit in the fleshy unprotected neck, a shot to the jugular. The archdemon roared in pain and fury, a claw caught Tatria and sent her flying, she saw double as she hit her head and spat out a mouthful of blood. The duelist grinned a bloody smile, “Look at yer, high and mighty dragon brought to its knees by a ragtag band of misfits.” She hawked and spat, “Archdemons, not much cop eh, at least the one pretending to be Andraste died on its feet.”

That was when Tatria's heart leapt to her mouth, still seeing double she saw two Alistairs running towards his sword, fuck, shit, fuckfuckfuck, Tatria ran and launched herself at one of them...sighing a sigh of relief as she felt ankles in her grasp and sent Alistair tumbling, “No, Alistair, you were not meant to die.”

“Well I am not going to let you die, am I?”

Curse the man for finding his backbone...curse her for showing him where to look, “Ferelden needs you more than it needs an elf more, my love, and Ferelden is where both our first loyalty lies.” She allowed tears to fall as she grabbed his face and kissed him, “Do for my people what I never could, and use my death to do it.” She didn't give Alistair a chance to respond as she threw dust in his eyes.

Tatria looked at the dragon, she looked at the sword her love had been going for, her path was set. She whispered a prayer to keep her nerve, to not falter, to tell the Maker, should he choose to listen, that she was coming, “Blessed are they who stand before the corrupt and the wicked and do not falter. Blessed are the peacekeepers, the champions of the just.” She set off at a run, her hand reaching, grasping, taking, the whole journey, from her wedding day to her death, flashing through her mind in a second, she felt the sword strike true then rip and tear, “FEREEEELLLLDEEEEEENNNN!”

There was an explosion that ripped through her skull, the light...was...so...pretty.

And then there was nothing.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A letter left for Alistair

Dearest Alistair

If you are reading this then Leliana has given you the letter that I asked her to give you if I killed the archdemon, I know I killed the archdemon because I gave her another one in case some random darkspawn killed me, always be prepared! If I know you and I know me, I also stopped you from doing it. I apologise for that, forgive me?

Well I am dead, I guess I won't know if you forgive me.

Maker where do I begin? I had wanted to write down all the things I never got to say but there were far too many of them, they can be all said in one thing I have said to you, I love you. I have always loved you and I have never loved you any the less for the things that we were forced to do.

So how to fix the messes I left behind that I could not fix in life? I guess there is not a lot that can be done but to tell you the truth of things.

I have been living on borrowed time, since Duncan conscripted me, I felt death's touch on my shoulder. I feel almost that I have lived a charmed life since, a split second reaction or intuition, the prickle of hair on the back of my neck, I have always felt that I was kept to die at the right time. I have had a long time to make peace with that.

People focus too much on the surviving and the happily ever after. Alistair, I was going to die tortured in an Arl's dungeon, I was going to die fighting a horde of darkspawn, I will TAKE dying because I killed an archdemon, that is a death worth dying. Happily ever after is not a thing that is attainable, you take happiness and victories where you can get them.

I know that it is going to be hard, I know that you will have to adapt, I know you can do it. Maker there is so much more I want to write but the battle is ahead of me in the here and now just as it is passed in your hands.

Love, live, be happy, rule fairly and wisely. Wynne told me once that a good King rules for the people, that he serves even as he is served. Be that good King my love.

Yours always and forever  
Tatria Tabris


End file.
